Equal Rights Compared To Partnership: The Big Difference That Makes All The Difference
My partner, N'omi is often asked if she doesn't believe in equality for women, mainly because some of the things she says sounds odd to the modern day ear. But she always replies:
"Why should I give up superiority for mere equality? I've worked at establishing my feminine traits and my human skills. So as a woman, I am superior. But as a man, I'm a failure.
Why waste my time trying to be something I'm not? I can compete properly with men in terms of some of my human skills. But just as men can never compete with women in terms of feminine traits, I can never compete with guys in terms of masculine traits.
During the several years just before I met Joel, I functioned as father and mother to five of my young children. I was only able to fulfill the dad role by telling my children stories of how wonderful their father was, and just how much he loved them, and was proud of them. But I could not be a father to them; only a faithful mother.
So I believe in being the best of what I can be. That includes my feminine qualities, and it includes my human qualities. For this reason, I'm a very powerful woman, emotionally and mentally. I am not in conflict with myself or with the people around me.
I'm busy being me, and getting happier and far more fulfilled with each and every passing year."
N'omi is really that fantastic woman, powerful and focused on fulfilling her potential, in her own life, along with our life together.
What exactly do N'omi and I have? Are we equal? No, because equal means the same. Men and females aren't the same.
The only way in which all folks are "created equal" is that we all have the same 24 hours a day in which to make decisions about who we have decided to be.
Relationships aren't 1 1 = 2. That would be equality. Human relationships are a partnership, to which each partner brings a different assortment of qualities: character traits, aptitudes, attributes, thoughts, beliefs, as well as other accumulated things which makes them who they are.
In fact, this means that no two humans, regardless of gender, are really "equal" when they come together.
But when in relationships, you're joining two very different sets of qualities, and adding gender qualities to the equation. This can be a volatile mix since it really is a partnership of unequals, not an equality of two identical parties. This is why dating to relating can be difficult for us and specifically for men who try anxiously to attract females.
We need to discard the idea that "unequal" indicates one is superior and one inferior. That is not what it means. "Unequal" means "not the same," or "different." And anyone can see that every human is different from every other human.
Individual qualities are individual and never gender-specific. But there are gender-specific qualities that exist and must be recognized for what they are just before true partnership can bloom.
Remember: Men and females are two races that share the same planet, but not much else! When dating and relating with each other happily, they have to learn about what's unchangeable-in their own and in their partner's nature-and what may be modified.
Then they will stop blaming, and start working together. That is partnership!
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